Hayden Hurst, a Cincinnati Bengals tight end, discusses his anxiety and attempted suicide.
Warning: This article includes allusions to suicide; Hayden Hurst: “Everybody goes through their own thing – anxiety, depression – though to what extent may vary… I know what it’s like to be in that headspace”
Hayden Hurst, a Cincinnati Bengals tight end, is having one of his greatest seasons in the NFL in 2022, but the former baseball prodigy almost never got it there due to his terrible struggle with anxiety that nearly led to his suicide.
Warning: this page includes allusions to suicide.
Hurst was picked by the Pittsburgh Pirates in the 2012 Major League Baseball draft, but he left the game two years later after developing ‘the yips’ as his anxiety worsened.
Hurst switched his concentration to football after receiving a collegiate scholarship to the University of South Carolina, hoping that the new beginning would help his mental state.
Hurst said to Sky Sports’ Neil Reynolds, “When I made the change, I figured I’d go to college, have fun, be a kid for a little bit, and for quality of life.”
“I thought I was putting all of that (worry) behind, but it’s part of who I am.
“Unfortunately, it followed me to Columbia, South Carolina. I continued to engage in off-the-field activities such as drinking and drug use, which exacerbated my condition. It made matters worse.
“I made some decisions there that led to my attempt [at suicide].”
“Looking back, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy, but it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me because it completely turned my life around.”
“It was a tough three or four years but it changed the person I was, changed the man I am now.”
‘My hands would start trembling and sweating.’
Hurst has been sober since 2016 and has gone on to have a very successful NFL career, entering the league in 2018 as a first-round draft pick for the Baltimore Ravens before making his way to Cincinnati – via a stint with the Atlanta Falcons – where he has 388 receiving yards and two touchdowns this season.
Reflecting on his early struggles with nervousness on the baseball field, the former pitcher remarked, “Being 18 years old and now having to go play a grown man’s sport, professional baseball, I was sort of shell-shocked.
“I’ve always relied on my family to be my support system and rock, so having them so far away was difficult. It was difficult for me to deal with; it may have contributed to my problem with baseball and my worry.
“My hands would start trembling and sweating. I’d have no idea where the ball would go, which was difficult for me to comprehend and accept because baseball was always so simple.
“It was difficult. It was so odd, and I still don’t know where it came from, how it happened, or how I might have rectified it.”
Hurst went on to say how much his family has helped him through his worst periods, saying, “They’re awesome.” They were always just a phone call away, and they’d travel down [to see me] whenever I needed them, which was nearly every weekend. “These are my people.”
Hurst and his mother, Cathy, have subsequently established the ‘Hayden Hurst Family Foundation’ to raise awareness about mental health concerns in children, adolescents, and the military.
“It’s very relatable,” Hurst remarked when asked why he chose to relate his experience. “Everybody experiences anxiety and depression, but to varying degrees.
“I put it all out there because I understand what it’s like to be in that mentality. You feel alone, as if no one else could possibly feel the same way you do, yet the truth is quite the contrary.
“I am who I am because it shaped who I am now. And if it helps save lives, I’ll share my entire tale.”
Williamson: I felt that the coaches had screwed with my brain.
According to Hurst, anxiety and sadness affect everyone to varied degrees. However, the stresses of elite-level sports can occasionally push them to the surface.
Former NFL linebacker Avery Williamson responded to Hurst’s interview in the Sky Sports studio by sharing his personal tale of how his mental health was negatively impacted while playing the game.
“As a kid, you chase that dream being a professional player and you only see on TV them playing football on Sundays,” he told me. “It’s only when you get older that you realize it’s ‘work’.
“Every day, there is pressure; someone is always attempting to take your position. You must perform, especially if you are not a top selection pick. As a fifth-round [draft] pick, I had to be great every day in practice, especially during games.
“I would be anxious heading into games and waking up on Sunday morning. Sometimes I wouldn’t.
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